Black women in the professional place vs. personal life


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CEE DOG

CEE DOG

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Last Wednesday on my way to the airport Michael Basiden show was about “why is it that most black women can be so successful in corporate America, but they fail at an alarming rate when it comes to their personal relationship?” Black women seem to manage multi million dollar companies and programs and lead their staff in remarkable direction, yet when dealing with male counter parts they fall apart? What’s your take on this? Many people called in and said it amazed them how they can be so strong in the work place against men, but when dealing with them in relationships men run all over them.
 
CEE DOG said:
Last Wednesday on my way to the airport Michael Basiden show was about ?why is it that most black women can be so successful in corporate America, but they fail at an alarming rate when it comes to their personal relationship?? Black women seem to manage multi million dollar companies and programs and lead their staff in remarkable direction, yet when dealing with male counter parts they fall apart? What?s your take on this? Many people called in and said it amazed them how they can be so strong in the work place against men, but when dealing with them in relationships men run all over them.
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To me it's not simply a "female" thing, it is a both "male and female" issue. Right now our society is dealing with a large number of single parent households where the woman is raising the child. Well what happens is women grow up seeing a strong mother, and men grow up being passive because he sees a woman in both roles as the mother and father.

This leads to men who really don't know HOW to be men, and women feeling that when a man is being strong he is being domineering which is not the case.

The only way to fix it is through individualism because this problem will last forever. What I mean by individualism is, men talking to women and explaining what rolls actually mean. Defining them spiritualy with your partner.

I ask each woman I date one question, "What is your relationship with your father." That's important to me because if she does not know how to treat her father how will she know how to treat me.
 
Having a good relationship with their Fathers is still not bullet proof. Being a daughter and sleeping with her is to different worlds.
 
Men are always attracted to strong, independent women but they when men realize that the "go get it", "take control", "I'm the HNIC" competitive attitude doesn't turn off, they have a problem with it. And vice versa.
 
It is my belief that no matter how materially successful a women
Is, she still longs to hear this, feel this, and experience this.

?Baby I love you with all my heart, you are everything I could ever
dream of in a women, God has truly placed on my heart that you
are some one I could join with, & make Him smile & together we?ll
see tomorrow, and if you so agree I promise through the wisdom, &
Ordered steps of My father to guide you, and us to as much heaven on earth,
As you can stand?

But alas in that search, even some of the Smartest women

Make wrong choices
Settle
Or totally stop believing that exist

May we all find that resting place. :shame:
 
chocalate_topaz said:
Men are always attracted to strong, independent women but they when men realize that the "go get it", "take control", "I'm the HNIC" competitive attitude doesn't turn off, they have a problem with it. And vice versa.
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True. I wonder if we as black men/women will ever reach a balance in our race when dealing with each other. Everything doesn't always have to be confrontational between us.
 
CEE DOG said:
True. I wonder if we as black men/women will ever reach a balance in our race when dealing with each other. Everything doesn't always have to be confrontational between us.
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I truly we hope we can. We just have to work on OUR own situations, push the rest of the world out and be real with each other.
 
chocalate_topaz said:
I truly we hope we can. We just have to work on OUR own situations, push the rest of the world out and be real with each other.
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Now you?re talking. I think if we learn to focus on us instead of competing with each other a balance would come about.
 
chocalate_topaz said:
Men are always attracted to strong, independent women but they when men realize that the "go get it", "take control", "I'm the HNIC" competitive attitude doesn't turn off, they have a problem with it. And vice versa.
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You are suppose to turn that sh@t off when you go home. they are two different enviroments that require seperate skills to succeed/ survive in.
 
chocalate_topaz said:
Men are always attracted to strong, independent women but they when men realize that the "go get it", "take control", "I'm the HNIC" competitive attitude doesn't turn off, they have a problem with it. And vice versa.
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True. I want a partner non an opponent. Let's be a team and do the damn thang.

What I hate most is when women get in their little groups and ask questions about men. Most men would prefer for you to come ask them. It gives me a sense of trust in the woman. Just ask and I will tell. The sad part is when it comes to personally, off the SWACPage I am blantely honest which gets me in to trouble because sometimes the truth hurts so much.

I think it's one thing that men love to hear, which is, "My man got that under control." Again it gives the man a sense of trust and responsibility. Men like things to be on their shoulders because by nature we are provider and problem solvers.
 
northern tiger said:
You are suppose to turn that sh@t off when you go home. they are two different enviroments that require seperate skills to succeed/ survive in.
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The sad part is most people can't turn it off. Then they wonder why it's hard to maintain a relationship.
 
CEE DOG said:
Everything doesn't always have to be confrontational between us.
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Put that on a t-shirt please. Don't always been on defense. A woman asking you a question is not always her trying to attack you.
 
JSTUS said:
Put that on a t-shirt please. Don't always been on defense. A woman asking you a question is not always her trying to attack you.
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That wasn't in reference to women, not men. Evidently the majority of black women never heard of the song by Morris Day called, "Love is a game you don't play to win, you play to survive".
 
CEE DOG said:
Last Wednesday on my way to the airport Michael Basiden show was about ?why is it that most black women can be so successful in corporate America, but they fail at an alarming rate when it comes to their personal relationship?? Black women seem to manage multi million dollar companies and programs and lead their staff in remarkable direction, yet when dealing with male counter parts they fall apart? What?s your take on this? Many people called in and said it amazed them how they can be so strong in the work place against men, but when dealing with them in relationships men run all over them.
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At least you were honest about where you go the topic. :lol:
 



I'll just break it down & talk to her awhile
I’ll let her know that I can understand the problems and her worries
When you love a man like me
I tell her I love her
I tell her
You belong to me &
I belong to you,
And we belong to each other,


I know There’ll be times when you’ll be down
and sometimes I’ll be troubled
But together we’re rising stars
& dont worry, I will never in our lifetime betray you
Or bring you down from the pedestal
where I’ve placed you

You're a queen to me
And Lord knows Tony is a king to you,
And we belong to each other

Continue, continue continue…..
 
northern tiger said:
That wasn't in reference to women, not men. Evidently the majority of black women never heard of the song by Morris Day called, "Love is a game you don't play to win, you play to survive".
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My comment was in reference to everything not having to be confrontational.
I understand Morris' message.
 
northern tiger said:
At least you were honest about where you go the topic. :lol:
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:lol: I knew ya ll was listening last week too. :lol: Plus the puddins already want to tear a whole in me, so I had to let them know it was Mike's idea not mine. :lol: Hey puddins where ya'll at? Come on out. :wavey:
 
CEE DOG said:
The sad part is most people can't turn it off. Then they wonder why it's hard to maintain a relationship.
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I have both witnessed and lived through this myself.
 
BILBREW said:
I have both witnessed and lived through this myself.
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Yeah man, career driven women are hard to get along with sometimes. They can't seem to understand relationship roles vs. business roles.
 
Dr. Sweet NUPE said:
What I hate most is when women get in their little groups and ask questions about men. Most men would prefer for you to come ask them. It gives me a sense of trust in the woman. Just ask and I will tell.
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I'm so happy men aren't guilty of doing this. :tup:
 
kellis said:
I'm so happy men aren't guilty of doing this. :tup:
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I never said men were not. I said what I hate for women to do. Instead of asking in little groups...ask me. Usually when a man or a woman ask in little groups the answers are wrong. A girl you quit knit picking, ask what's on your mind.
 
I know, right? That isth NEVER happens when men get together! :tup:

Anyway, if I was as micromanaging and controlling at home the way I am in my classroom, I think my entire family would end up on CourtTV for plotting my demise.

Then again, I had a good role model. I saw my mother in action. Her work persona was nowhere NEAR her home one.

Damn, I'm glad! :scared:
 
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