Why even get married?
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PsiSnake
Well-Known Member
Ya know.....I think about that all-da-time; but I feel it'sa know win situation. I mean, how am I suppose to know whats goin on inside a womans head. I could be thinkin all-is-well in'da house, not knowing shes thinkin totally opposite.
But to answer ya question; What I would do differently?..Hmmm....well maybe I would do more things together as'a couple e.g. movies, dinner, gym, wal-mart, etc. , or jus plain talk about little things such as, "How Was Your Day Today", blah-blah-blah................But its funny to me though, because I felt like I did all those thangs; but after talkin to my "ex" on different occasions, she brings things up like that; and I be like WTF?
I dunno Ms. Jag4Jag.....ya boi is scarred fa'life. I look at "love" a totally different way. I know its unfair to all the other good gurls out there, but.........................................................
MsJag4Jag
Moderator
PsiSnake: I understand. IT seems (based on what you just typed) there maybe a lapse in communication. Meaning, nobody was saying too much of anything. Or maybe neither was saying what was needed...It happens sometimes...you won't be scarred for life...just until you heal from this...and are truly able to move on... It can make a deep impression though!
PsiSnake
Well-Known Member
Yeah Ms. Jag,
I can admit that, about communication. My routine or should I say da way I functioned remained the same from College until the divorce. I have ways, she had ways. So why is'it(my)a problem in 2001. Where's da love? If you love'a person those "little things" don't really mean nuthin.
Nah-Mean??
I can admit that, about communication. My routine or should I say da way I functioned remained the same from College until the divorce. I have ways, she had ways. So why is'it(my)a problem in 2001. Where's da love? If you love'a person those "little things" don't really mean nuthin.
Nah-Mean??
MightyDog
Well-Known Member
Maybe the divorce was to get your attention.
Call her up
Ask her for a date
Take her to a Soul Food place.
Then go to Wal-mart and meet some of your old friends.
Then on the way home ask her to marry you.
After the shock wears off, give her three days.
After three days and she has not made a decision.
You are on your own. But don't get drunk.
and ask her to marry you. Give her 3 days to reply.
Call her up
Ask her for a date
Take her to a Soul Food place.
Then go to Wal-mart and meet some of your old friends.
Then on the way home ask her to marry you.
After the shock wears off, give her three days.
After three days and she has not made a decision.
You are on your own. But don't get drunk.
and ask her to marry you. Give her 3 days to reply.
Blacknbengal
Well-Known Member
What part of ATL do you live in? Cause me and my friends have started this "Fools Club" down here in Jonesboro. It's for men that is faced with this decision and decides to go ahead and do it.
So, just be informed that if you decide to go ahead with this decision that you can just send us your info and we will add you to the list. We meet every Sunday afternoon around 4-5 pm.
Oh, did I mention that I was the President? Well, I will be lookin for you if you do decide to take MD's advice. We give nice and warm welcomes to the new inmates...oh....I mean inductees.
aamuprettywoman
AAMU all day every day!
You're close!!!!!
I'm in Ellenwood.
Take a drink and at least attempt to take MD's advice if both of you want things to work out. I mean look @ Mike and Juanita. Anything's possible.
I'm in Ellenwood.
Take a drink and at least attempt to take MD's advice if both of you want things to work out. I mean look @ Mike and Juanita. Anything's possible.
MightyDog
Well-Known Member
Most men will not get a divorce, if they overhear the wife saying to her girlfriend, I can't fart, because he is always following me around. This is why if you suspect something always asked her to bring back something that will spoil. Always asked for the receipt because they now have the time of purchase on it. Check to see how long it takes her to drive to and from work. Check the oil monitoring system to see how many miles she is traveling. Buy her an expensive automobile for the purpose of checking the mileage. Now some women will call this insecure, but it is just like watching the Stock Market 5 days a week and sleeping with one eye opened the other two days.
APW what happened to the Lawyer and Doctor? Did he Marry her?
APW what happened to the Lawyer and Doctor? Did he Marry her?
TBoneLady1946_AAMU
New Member
STEP AWAY FROM THE CUP!!!
Snake, sorry bout everything going on, if you need your lil sister's ear, I am always here!
Can't wait to see you at convention!
til then...
STEP AWAY FROM THE CUP!!!
Blacknbengal
Well-Known Member
Originally posted by PsiSnake
LMAO!!!!!**spills coffee**
Don't wanna be apart of that foolishness...but I'll be glad to be a guest speaker at one'of ya functions. The title of my speech will be, "Dont Let Her Fool'Ya" :lmao:
I'm on'da southside......RIVERDALE
Riverdale!!!! Yeah, you're just 5 -7 minutes away. You can come down every Sunday. Trust me, you would want to join. We do very exciting things. Let's see.....we go to the movies....uhhh...go riding on the town (every now and then).....uh......hang out over each other's house.....and.......OH yeah, we are getting ready to plan our Annual "Fools" Retreat. You could join just in time too. This year, I believe that we will take a trip outta town. Maybe, to Lake Lanier or somewhere when it get warm.
P. S. We would enjoy your speech, but just one little thing. It is alittle too late for that speech to us.
Misconduct
New Member
Psi I agree with you 100%. We never know what is going on in a woman's head. But one thing that I learned. You need communication. Think about college you did all you could to get a woman. A marriage is a lifetime dating commitment. Do all you can. Take her to eat icecream when she least expects it, bubble baths with rose pedals when she comes home late from work, hershey kisses at the door leading to bedroom with a single white rose and a card to say I love you... Not expensive but shows her that she is appreciated....
:bawling: no more things will get better.....
Learning on stimulates the mind, for I have been where you are...
PsiSnake
Well-Known Member
Yeah...great advice; I will remember that IF I ever marry again.
Ya see, I look at'it like this; if you really really love somebody like you say you do, you'll accept them for what they are and not for what you want them to be like. Women has this "fantasy" of'a perfect man and expect for they man to be there fantasy husband. Regarding me and one'of the issues I believe caused her to want to divorce was communication or shall I say "being more talkative"; well everybody that knows "Snake" knows that he has'a quiet side.....I'll get quiet own'u ina minute......, thats just me. My "ex" is the same, she's very quiet..well until she got around her mom & dad
; I say this to say that all-of-a sudden, she wants to be this talkative out-going person and expected for me to do all this talking.Now, I'm not sayin we didn say anything to each other in the house because of our "quiet at times" personalities"....dont get'it twisted...." , but to me, it was the regular everyday routine.
But anyway...like I've told her(after the divorce), if I had known how she was feelin inside. Oh well.......its 2002 Rent Still Due!! :lmao:
PsiSnake
Well-Known Member
LOL@Mighty Dog,
It'sa longgggggg story my friend .
Ms. Jag,
Well naturally I/we would've compromised and worked thangs out because thats my'gul.....but really, homegirl got caught-up in something she didnt know how'ta handle, and now she's using all these "so-called" issues as a scapegoat. Now I'm not sayin her issues weren't valid, but not enough to warrant a divorce. Hell I couldn make her stay, but I certainly wasn't gone put'up wit what she was doing either!.......see, look at me, going off into another area.....
~SMH~
It'sa longgggggg story my friend
.Ms. Jag,
Well naturally I/we would've compromised and worked thangs out because thats my'gul.....but really, homegirl got caught-up in something she didnt know how'ta handle, and now she's using all these "so-called" issues as a scapegoat. Now I'm not sayin her issues weren't valid, but not enough to warrant a divorce. Hell I couldn make her stay, but I certainly wasn't gone put'up wit what she was doing either!.......see, look at me, going off into another area.....
~SMH~
MightyDog
Well-Known Member
Lucky, you are ready to get married when your sweetheart tell you. If you do not hear it from her first you are not ready. You are not the one. So you can either hang around or move on.
They will ask you to make a decision, if you get stupid when asked they know it is time to send you packing or wait until the next ship come by.
There is no such thing as staying together to see if you think marriage will work. When a arrangement is set up nobody want to get married in the first place.
Again, you will know it when she tell you.
They will ask you to make a decision, if you get stupid when asked they know it is time to send you packing or wait until the next ship come by.
There is no such thing as staying together to see if you think marriage will work. When a arrangement is set up nobody want to get married in the first place.
Again, you will know it when she tell you.
aamuprettywoman
AAMU all day every day!
I would never ask a man to marry me!
If he's ready he can do the asking. Some things a man just has to do in my book. In my opinion, if a woman has to ask a man to marry her there's two things you should already know.
1) He isn't ready for marriage.
2) You need to deal with it and/or move on.
"L" nawhl...dood never back tracked. He(the lawyer) dated everything in sight and doesn't have a steady girl right now. She (the doctor) is now a doctor and of course her name plates @ the office reads her maiden name.
Some of my girls still think he should have married her because the invitations had went out, the reservations for the honeymoon and reception were made and other money had been spent.
I still stand my ground in saying, he did the right thing. He wasn't in love with her, he wasn't ready to get married and she should thank him for doing her the favor of calling the wedding off. There were no I do's passed and she may not believe it now, but she'll find the "one." As well she should. He simply was not "the one." I ask this question all the time, why rush? If it's meant to be, it will be. That may be 1 year from now or 10. But, my advice is to wait and see what God has in store for you instead of try'n to map out your own plans in life. That includes marriage.
<font size=6 color=green>
Oh did I tell yawhllll that I am getting................<font>
:teleport:
If he's ready he can do the asking. Some things a man just has to do in my book. In my opinion, if a woman has to ask a man to marry her there's two things you should already know.
1) He isn't ready for marriage.
2) You need to deal with it and/or move on.
"L" nawhl...dood never back tracked. He(the lawyer) dated everything in sight and doesn't have a steady girl right now. She (the doctor) is now a doctor and of course her name plates @ the office reads her maiden name.
Some of my girls still think he should have married her because the invitations had went out, the reservations for the honeymoon and reception were made and other money had been spent.
I still stand my ground in saying, he did the right thing. He wasn't in love with her, he wasn't ready to get married and she should thank him for doing her the favor of calling the wedding off. There were no I do's passed and she may not believe it now, but she'll find the "one." As well she should. He simply was not "the one." I ask this question all the time, why rush? If it's meant to be, it will be. That may be 1 year from now or 10. But, my advice is to wait and see what God has in store for you instead of try'n to map out your own plans in life. That includes marriage.
<font size=6 color=green>
Oh did I tell yawhllll that I am getting................<font>
:teleport:
LUCKY
Mr Eyecatcher
Wooh Lets Slow Down!!
The question that I asked didn't have anything to do with me.
One of my good friends is thinking of marriage. In his case this is really his first true love, and he just wants to make sure that he's gonna be doing the right thing in the long run. I know her personally like my sister, and I told him that I think she's the one for him. Right now really the brother is just really trying to see if it's gonna be a mistake, or should he just go ahead and propose.
The question that I asked didn't have anything to do with me.
One of my good friends is thinking of marriage. In his case this is really his first true love, and he just wants to make sure that he's gonna be doing the right thing in the long run. I know her personally like my sister, and I told him that I think she's the one for him. Right now really the brother is just really trying to see if it's gonna be a mistake, or should he just go ahead and propose.
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