Should Married Couples be "Equally Yoked"?


Do you think it is best for marrie

  • Yes

    Votes: 8 66.7%

  • No

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Does not matter.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • More so than not.

    Votes: 4 33.3%
  • Total voters
    12
Bartram

Bartram

Brand HBCUbian
Specifically I'm speaking of those from HBCUs. My Mom and Pop both went to an HBCU. Both came from similar backgrounds. As far as I can tell, their union is a good one. They have been together for about 45 years since graduating college basically.

A series of questions. Does being "equally yoked" determine the ultimate success of marriage? By "equally yoked" I'm speaking mainly of both of them being college graduates and being from family backgrounds characterized by a strong family unit and dominant strong male roll model with a regulating female roll model.

For example, if you are matriculating through college, does it matter if you marry someone not in college or going to college? Would this make a large difference in a marrital relationship and/or it's longevity?

From the other end, do we outsmart ourselves thinking that the only suitable mate has to be "at our level" or higher?
 
It might be better to have similar backgrounds more than it would to not have them. But that sounds better written than it is to make sure it happens.

There are plenty cases where folks from different walks of life make a go of it...and are succesful. IMO, it depends on the two people.
 

I believe it is important for a couple to be equally yoke. What I mean by equally yoke is that they should have the same desires, values, and goals. When you share these common traits it's much easier to become one.

I don't believe you need to have the same education, attend the same schools, or be a member of the same denomination to be equally yoked. There are a lot of couples who have these things in common that are divorced.
 
"Equally Yoked"? My Bible says to be equally Yoked, but it wasn't speaking in terms of education, money, etc. Yes couples should be equally yoked. If they are biblically equally yoked, then they don't have anything to worry about.
 
Oh Yes!!!!

I was taught in our prematital counseling that equally yoked means to have the same desires for Christ in our lives. Equally yoked does not mean that we earn the same amount of money, have the same level of education, or same thoughts on things. We will disagree because we are humans. I am married and me and my wife have had major disagreements about things but we always remembered who put us together and we know that we can turn to God when things get too out of control.
 
Time will tell...

I will never say that I wouldn't marry someone simply because he or she did not attend a college or university. I'd prefer it, but there are many a millionaires out there who haven't touched a college or university other than contributing to them financially.
I won't become involved with anyone who has no obvious aspirations or career plans in the works or completed, but that's my choice, my right! I do think it is important to make sure your mate has similar interests as well as different interests. You have some say so, but God has the ultimate plan for what you will or won't have in your life as a mate. So, live and choose wisely...don't settle!;)

He would have to definitely believe in God! NO exceptions!
 
Yeah, the bible equally yoked is not referring to money, education, careers, ect. It is speaking about CHRIST. If a saved person is looking for a mate, they should look for a person that is saved also or atleast someone that is going in that direction. But if a couple is already married and one of them was to accept CHRIST then they would be unequally yoked until the mate accepts CHIRST also. To be continued.........
 
Yeah, this one is kind of dicey.

I was attempting to keep the spiritual question of being "equally yoked" separate from the secular aspect. I didn't want to touch the spiritual aspect because that's like arguing politics, but since it has been breeched I would concure that not being equally yoked spiritually could be a slight problem. I would not go further on that.

On the secular side though, I would contend that it is prefereable to be "equally yoked" in terms of they way some of you have better defined it; similar goals, similar work ethic, values, etc. Those are some mighty strong fundamental characteristics and you usually can't go wrong if they are in place is all I can say,, but that's open for debate.
 
Maximus that is not true, if you are married and one of the spouses is saved then the other is too because you are as one in the eyes of god now. (Ex. ) If the wife is the saved one and her husband is not in the eyes of the church he is not saved ,but in god eyes he is saved because her spiritual blessings are his too because in god eyes the husbands body is the wife and the wifes body is the husbands.
 
What are you talking about Cee Dog?

Cee Dog, I don't think that is correct. You might want to research that philosophy a little deeper.
 
No my friend I am correct. I will not get into a argument with you over this but read the book it is in their. Seek and yea will find the answer !!!!
 
Cee "Johny Kocran" Dog?

:p,,,,,,,,, uuh-Cee Dog,,,,, are you going to defend that woman in Texas that drowned her five kids???? With rationale like that, it sounds like you are already practicing law. The husband and wife are one in body in the sight of God, therefore they are equally yoked; THAT, my friend, IS CLASSIC.:confused:
 
Like I said before, I don't argue with people about religion because of comments like that. Who in the world said anything about defending people that kill people or do wrong. One question and I will leave this along. If you read the bible it tells you when a man and woman are married they become as one. The husbands body is his wifes and the wifes body is the husband. So ex. if the husband sins he has sinned against his wifes body two. Thinking logical now, If we are as one and I am saved that means my wife is two. Stop thinking like the Europeans that every time a brother says anything it has to be challenged. Peace be unto you my brother and sisters on this subject.
 

Cee Dog,

I'm not trying to cause a argument, I just want to know where I can read this to understand where you are coming from. Once again, please help a brother out.
 
getting back to INITIAL topic at hand........

In regard to Bartram's SECULAR "equally yoked" philosophy...

YES, I do feel that a couple has to be "equally yoked" to a strong degree.

To be honest, it would be hard for me to marry woman who is college educated woman. Do I feel that a CEW I'm any better?...no (although, many people think otherwise). Do I feel that a CEW I has more opportunities to prosper and get ahead?....yes, and that is extremely important. PWC or HBCU...education is crucial.
Some people think I'm wrong for "dissin'" other women, but hey...why should *I* settle????

But don't get it twisted, now...
There are many Knuckleheaded women who went to college. On the flipside, there are many successful women who never set foot in a college classroom. To me, the key is SUCCESS, and the "potential" to ATTAIN it. I can't see myself with a woman in a "nowhere" job. What's the point? I want someone who can grow WITH me...not somebody who's satisfied with the same ol' same ol...
Financially stability is essential, especially since that is probably the BIGGEST reason why marriages don't last now (with infidelity runnin' not too far behind:)).

Aye, I'm doing MY thang....and my mate has to be doing HER thang too, so that we can be better prepared to do OUR thang in the future! :D
If she makes more than me or is more successful....COOL, because I know that I'm handling mine. She can help make us so much better.


I'm not gonna comment, as far as the spiritual apect is concerned....
 
My brothers I will now post the scripture that I got this from. You may get a different meaning than me but this is my thought. God Bless. I know you are not trying to argue you are just seeking knowledge my freind which is a good thing.
:p

1 Corinthians 7 :

12
To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.
13
And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.
14
For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
15
But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.
16
How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
17
Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches.


Marriage is deep my freind and we take it light. When you marry keep in my you are not two but one and the lord will guide you as one.
 
Cee Dog,

You're right that our understanding of this chapter in the bible are different. The bible is power when used correct, but it is also deadly if it is not used correctly.

Are you open to discuss the verses you posted and if so may I suggest you study why Paul was addressing the Corinthians. I'm not looking for an argument.
 
Yes I am always open for discussion. To start off I had this same disscusion with a group of ministers over lunch today. This is the same group who guided me toward this chapter. I know why Paul wrote this but I am willing to here your view. I understand what you say when the bible is a powerful book and one not to be taken lightly, but you must also understand there are a million different views on the bible so who am I to say that your view or my view is wrong. I leave that to a higher being my freind. You can ask five different ministers and all five will give you their view. God knows your attentions if they are good or bad so Hey I will let him be the judge of that.
 
Cee-Dog,

I believe there's only one piece of info that you're missing:

Justification = how to get to from earth to Heaven when you die.(believers)
Sanctification = how to experience a piece of Heaven before you get there through God's grace.(everyone)

Those scriptures in Corinthians you listed talked about a man or woman who is able to be sanctified(peace on earth) with their spouse but it SPECIFICALLY said that one of them was not a believer or justified(saved for heaven).
It says that if I'm saved(justified / sanctified) and my wife isn't saved than I shouldn't divorce her because she we can both experience sanctification through me while on earth, and she MAY even become justified in time, even if she's not on her way to heaven right now.

No one can become saved just because someone else is saved and the two marry. There's not going to be half believers and half unbelievers in heaven. We must individually except Jesus as our PERSONAL saviour to be saved. The bible teaches no other way for an individual to get to heaven.

It's all about understanding the difference between being justified(heaven situation) and sanctified(earth situation).

,
nevaehinvesting
 
You are so correct my freind. That was what I was trying to say to start with. I understand that only I kind get my self in to heaven not my wife. But God tells me not to put my wife away if she is not save beacuse the holy sprit will manifest through me to her and she still has a chance of being saved as long as their is life in her body. I wish I would have stated it like you and this could have been over along time. Thanks!!!!!
 
Cee Dog,

Since "nevaehinvesting" has address your statements and you are in agreement with him there is no need to discuss.

I would like to say that, although there are so many different views on this subject, it doesn't mean they all will be acceptable in God eyes.
 
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