Need some advice


C

Chris_Kelly

New Member
Hello all: I just joined the SWAC page being that I attended SU from 93-97. I need your help.

I just found out over the weekend that my wife had an affair. I love her and we do have children. I am being prayerful over the situation and I don't know what to do. Everything went south after I had some family to stay with us due to the hurricane. I felt that if they never came, this would have never happened. I'm hurt, but I do love my children and they mean everything to me. I love my wife but sometimes it is too much to bear. What do I do??
 
Be willing to forgive -

If you do not have it in your heart, you have the right to seperate "for a while" then get back together.

Do not put self before family.
 



Since you posted it in the prayer forum... Pray about it and see where your heart lies. You may decide to give it another chance if she seems willing to change.

How do you know she cheated?
 
She told me after a huge fight with the family that was living with us. This never happened before. Plus I knew with the direction God wants me to go, the enemy launched an all out attack on us.
 
Chris_Kelly said:
Hello all: I just joined the SWAC page being that I attended SU from 93-97. I need your help.

I just found out over the weekend that my wife had an affair. I love her and we do have children. I am being prayerful over the situation and I don't know what to do. Everything went south after I had some family to stay with us due to the hurricane. I felt that if they never came, this would have never happened. I'm hurt, but I do love my children and they mean everything to me. I love my wife but sometimes it is too much to bear. What do I do??
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I would suggest that you sit down and talk with your wife about this issue. You should also go and talk to a counselor.
 
If you are a man of faith, then you already know the answer to this question. You should always pray about any and everything that happens in your life.

As the man of the house God holds you responsible for EVERYTHING that happens in it. Be the head of your household.

What to do? Ask God. I am sure he want's you to stay unless you two are unequally yolked, then that's anothern post.

Stay with your wife.
Ask her what she wants to do. If she wants out then according to the scripture, let her go. This is the only other way mentioned in the Bible a man and a woman can get a divorce.
If she wants to stay, have her repent her sins, forgive her as a husband, and move on.
 
docmump said:
If you are a man of faith, then you already know the answer to this question. You should always pray about any and everything that happens in your life.

As the man of the house God holds you responsible for EVERYTHING that happens in it. Be the head of your household.

What to do? Ask God. I am sure he want's you to stay unless you two are unequally yolked, then that's anothern post.

Stay with your wife.
Ask her what she wants to do. If she wants out then according to the scripture, let her go. This is the only other way mentioned in the Bible a man and a woman can get a divorce.
If she wants to stay, have her repent her sins, forgive her as a husband, and move on.
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Thanks Man of God. It hurts all the more when both of us are in the Word. I felt betrayed because one of my cousins who I conside like a sister knew and she said she always "had my back." I guess when we all fell out, that went out of the window. It's a shame she is going through the same thing with her husband and didn't even consider my feelings. Then to add insult to injury she indirectly threw that in my face when we fell out. How I feel right now is I wish they never came by. I made it possible for them to leave New Orleans and they messed all over me. I prayed for all of them and they pretty much slapped me accross my face. But, God bless them anyway because this I know, you reap what you sow.
 
Chris_Kelly said:
Thanks Man of God. It hurts all the more when both of us are in the Word. I felt betrayed because one of my cousins who I conside like a sister knew and she said she always "had my back." I guess when we all fell out, that went out of the window. It's a shame she is going through the same thing with her husband and didn't even consider my feelings. Then to add insult to injury she indirectly threw that in my face when we fell out. How I feel right now is I wish they never came by. I made it possible for them to leave New Orleans and they messed all over me. I prayed for all of them and they pretty much slapped me accross my face. But, God bless them anyway because this I know, you reap what you sow.
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Praying that you find peace in your situation. Meanwhile, just stand still and wait on the wisdom and direction from God.
 
Chris_Kelly said:
Thanks Man of God. It hurts all the more when both of us are in the Word. I felt betrayed because one of my cousins who I conside like a sister knew and she said she always "had my back." I guess when we all fell out, that went out of the window. It's a shame she is going through the same thing with her husband and didn't even consider my feelings. Then to add insult to injury she indirectly threw that in my face when we fell out. How I feel right now is I wish they never came by. I made it possible for them to leave New Orleans and they messed all over me. I prayed for all of them and they pretty much slapped me accross my face. But, God bless them anyway because this I know, you reap what you sow.
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Stop.... Did I read that you and your cousin fell out...:confused:

Mat 5:21-24 Ye have heard that it was said of them of old time, Thou shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment: But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.
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I hate to tell you this but as a Christian we must forgive those who done us wrong.. You must make up with your cousin. In order to be proper with God..
 
Chris_Kelly said:
Hello all: I just joined the SWAC page being that I attended SU from 93-97. I need your help.

I just found out over the weekend that my wife had an affair. I love her and we do have children. I am being prayerful over the situation and I don't know what to do. Everything went south after I had some family to stay with us due to the hurricane. I felt that if they never came, this would have never happened. I'm hurt, but I do love my children and they mean everything to me. I love my wife but sometimes it is too much to bear. What do I do??
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You know,...I've been sittin' here reading this thread for a few days now. I didn't want to comment because I did not want to confuse the situation. My heart goes out to you because I know what you are going through. I will only say that they are right and time can heal all wombs. Stay close to the Lord now more than ever.
Be strong!!!!
 
Thanks all of you. I know God will never put more on me, than I cannot bear. More often than not, the weights are way too heavy...
 



docmump said:
So Chris Kelly, What are you and your wife going to do?
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doc...my wife and I have decided to remain together. I knew that God had something in store for my family. I was listening to Israel and New Breeds new CD entitled "Alive in South Africa" and I heard their song, "I'm STILL Standing..." Israel says "life has hit me with its best shot, but I'm still standing."

It's amazing Israel said that because one of our favorite movies is Armageddon. There's one line where the Air Force Lieutenant(I can never remember his name, he was the guy with the one bad leg in Dead Presidents),
He said "you can fire as many nukes at that asteriod all you want to, she'll just laugh at you and keep going...".

When God laid that on my heart, I just laughed. As long as I put on the WHOLE ARMOUR of GOD....the devil can hit me with his best shot, but if I have on the WHOLE ARMOUR of GOD...I know, with God, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE.

We will be in constant prayer, fasting, and we will be moving next month as well as marital counseling. I will be taking this time to heal as well. My God is a God of RESTORATION and a SECOND CHANCE!

I have surrounded myself with praying folks and We both know what God had in store for us. It was prophesied that the enemy was attacking marriages. He attacked mine in nhopes to keep me from doing the will of the Lord. I know what God's plan is for me...SOULS! The devil is a DEFEATED FOE, and in the name of JESUS...WE HAVE THE VICTORY!!!
 
You are in my Prayers Bro!!! Continue to take it to The Lord in Prayer, and remember that when the enemy comes in like a flood that God will lift up a Standard against Him!!! May the Lord lift up a Standard in your marriage.
 
That's right Chris!! Let the devil know he is fighting a losing battle and he is a defeated foe!!! Hallelujah, another marriaged saved!!!
 
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