One evening last week, Tommy & his girlfriend were getting into bed.
Well, the passion starts to heat up, They were all over each other and just when I..I mean Tommy was ready to pound nails through two inch plywood she looks up at me..I mean Tommy and says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
Tommy said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to his puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, Tommy went to sleep.
The very next day Tommy opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We..I mean they, went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. Tommy walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I..I mean Tommy told her they'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so Tommy said lets get a pair for each outfit. We..I mean they went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought Tommy was one wave short of a shipwreck. Tommy started to think she was testing him because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think Tommy threw her for a loop when Tommy said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing something like sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
I.. I mean Tommy could hardly contain himself when He blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"
Tommy then said "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill Tommy, He added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Well, the passion starts to heat up, They were all over each other and just when I..I mean Tommy was ready to pound nails through two inch plywood she looks up at me..I mean Tommy and says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
Tommy said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to his puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, Tommy went to sleep.
The very next day Tommy opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We..I mean they, went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. Tommy walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I..I mean Tommy told her they'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so Tommy said lets get a pair for each outfit. We..I mean they went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought Tommy was one wave short of a shipwreck. Tommy started to think she was testing him because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think Tommy threw her for a loop when Tommy said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing something like sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."
I.. I mean Tommy could hardly contain himself when He blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"
Tommy then said "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill Tommy, He added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
