I hate my doctor!!!!


Status
Not open for further replies.

Suge

The Phat Mack
I don't believe this mess.....I am on a freakin Diet!!!

I am loosing my mind from the lack of more than 1,200 calories a day diet that my freaking doctor and nutritionist have forced me on just because a brother tipped the scales at over 300(and that high blood pressure thing, but that's not the issue right now)! And this is only day 2!! Dayum I'm just a big bone brutha, but they wasn't trying to hear that. I can't have ish like cookies(so I feel you Mike), chips, sodas. I'm drinking dayum crystal light, because kool aid has lots of calories too!!! I hate lettuce!! A brother can't even have starches like rice, potatoes, and bread. Dammit I am from LA, and the country at that. All we eat is rice and bread!! No dayum Jambalaya and my momma just sent me some and now it has to sit in the freakin freezer for at least a month, maybe longer! None of the blackeyed peas or red beans and rice and cornbread that I cooked on Monday either! I love cornbread! And then I bought some oysters and po boy bread on wednesday because I was going to make fried Oyster, shrimp, and catfish Po- Boys this weekend! I mean I can't have a coke. And pasta is out! I have to get diet coke....Just for the tatse of it my arse. Diet coka and sprite sucks arse!! And she had the nerve to say I could still eat seafood....but don't fry it. Why the hell would I want some dayum unfried shrimp and catfish!! I hate my doctor.

Brother had to buy a freakin foreman grill today. For dinner I get to eat just one freakin peice of meat and a dayum vegetable!! With no starch on the side! salad or something steamed is what she said. I can't even put cheese on my brocs!

And she insulted me by informing me that I may want to invest in some dayum slim fast! I looked her straight in the face and said.....I don't want to slim fast! I want to eat good! She just laughed and said "See you in 30 days"! I will not walk into a store and buy slim fast. For me that is like going and buying some pads for some woman!

And don't let me get on what she said about beer. I have a half a 12 of Amber Bach, and a 12 of heinys in the fridge.


I hate you Dr. Speer, and your lab test!!
 

pv_symbiotic

Ghetto Bourgeois
Suge...I have a beer for you. Daym I better watch because I am blowing up in my old age. I may hear the same news from my doctor.
 

Mike

Ace Dawg! RQQ!!!!
I think they trying to mess with the campaign....

First my cookies are too small and now Suge can't eat real food! This is an OUTRAGE! We must take a stand..... for a minute then my big arse will sit down. But we can't stand for this shat! We need to have Big Arse Cookies and real food! We are the TightArse Shirt people and dayummit we need to eat good and drink good!

I say Duck the Foctors!

I say Ruck the Fepublicans!

And I say GIVE ME MY BIG ASS COOKIES AND GIVE SUGE SOME REAL DAYUM FOOD!

That is all!:redhot:
 

Kenn Rashad

Person In Charge
Staff member
Originally posted by Suge
And she insulted me by informing me that I may want to invest in some dayum slim fast! I looked her straight in the face and said.....I don't want to slim fast! I want to eat good!

LMAO!!!

Man we might have to have a TSPN award for quote of the year! This quote and the quotes Mike made about them Chips-A-Hoy cookies are classic! :lmao:
 

Suge

The Phat Mack
And then it got worser....

I really feel like crying. I am so freakin hungry right now I was thinking about eating a booger!

Do you know what I had to eat today....

Breakfast...A banana!! Yes a banana. Not a banana in a bowl of frsted flakes. Not a penut nutter and banana sandwich. Just a freakin banana!!

Then for lunch......I had a dayum salad and water. And guess what. My co-workers were eating ribs, fried chicken, drinking a beer, big arsed burgers, philly cheese steaks........but not me. I'm eating lettuce and some dayum crowtons!

So I figure I will call my mom and get support, she says "Call me back son, I'm fixing your daddy some supper!" I say "O yeah ma ma, what you fixing" This is where it went wrong. She said " O, just some fried pork chops, biscuits from scratch, rice and gravy, and green beans"!

I just started sobbing......all I could have if I was there would be some green beans. Because my doctor, in her great wisdom, told me I can't have any fried foods!!!! For the next month!!! For lent I was gonna give up playstion or something, but now I'm having to give up something for real............FOOD!

Pray for me...the next 30 days will be the hardest of my life. Some people eat to live, some live to eat. I on the other hand eat because I can! Last night I had a wet dream about yard bird, fish and grits, red beans and rice, and po boys!

My dad is eating chops, and I am having some grilled tuna steaks and a single serving of corn! And for desert, some more crystal light!

Little Debbie, Krispy Kreme, send help!!!:bawling:
 

JSU*Toi

New Member
Re: And then it got worser....

Originally posted by Suge
I really feel like crying. I am so freakin hungry right now I was thinking about eating a booger!

...Last night I had a wet dream about yard bird, fish and grits, red beans and rice, and po boys!...


Little Debbie, Krispy Kreme, send help!!!:bawling:

***fell out rotflmao*** :lmao:
 

Seeing Spots

Joyful Woman!
Re: And then it got worser....

Originally posted by Suge
I really feel like crying. I am so freakin hungry right now I was thinking about eating a booger!

:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:
 

Seeing Spots

Joyful Woman!
Re: And then it got worser....

Originally posted by Suge
Last night I had a wet dream about yard bird, fish and grits, red beans and rice, and po boys!
:emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling: :bawling::emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh: :emlaugh:
 

Suge

The Phat Mack
You people may be laughing.....

.....but this is not funny! And to think my doctor, with her smart arse, was laughing at me too!! I don't think she knows what she is talking about. I mean she only went to Spellman and Howard medical. But she probably just scraped buy. I aske her to see her credentials, and she just laughed even harder. I told her i wasn't joking, but she kept laughing!

Suge : Why do I need to go on a diet
Doc: You are overweight and your pressure is way to high
Suge : Yeah, but I love to eat, besides I'm kool being fat
Doc : This isn't about your ego and self esteem, this is about
your life
Suge : Well if its my life, then I want to eat what I want
Doc : Quit being a baby, and just try the diet and see me in 30
days.
Suge : 30 Days!! What do I have to do..
Doc : Limit your diet to 1,000 to 1,500 calories per day
Suge : You can't be serious, can you
Doc : Yes I'm serious, you need to loose about 30-50 lbs.
Suge : 30-50, Do you realize that even if I loose 50 lbs I will still be fat, so what is the point. You trying to tell me that I'll be a skinnier fat than I am now, that makes no sense! I can just stay being fat fat!
Doc : Keels over in laughter and slaps my arm!
Suge : Doc, I am not laughing, you are depriving me of rights
Doc : Still keeling over........

I hate her!!! DAYUM !!!!

I think she is trying to get me back for not dating her neice!
 

MikeBigg

Well-Known Member
Serves your bigg phat candy azz right! You should have been like me, IN FIGHTING TRIM...

If only you would have stayed true to your North Louisiana upbringing. Growing up, we didn't eat no dayum fast food, it was field peas, chicken off the yard (after it's been "put up" for 2 weeks), smoked meat outta the smoke house, fish from the lakes, fresh tomatoes. For seasoning, we used the garlic that grew wild in the back yard.

Then on the third Saturday of each month, we would all line up to take our "working" medicine. Bi' Maa (Big Momma) would give each of us a table spoon of castor oil followed by a class of luke warm water (out of the pail). This water was put in the jelly jars and set in the sunlight for about 10-15 minutes to warm it just right.

So what you need to do (instead of getting on here and crying like a big old phat azz baby) is go down to the local store and get yourself a big bottle of Castor Oil and just purge your system. Take a teaspoon full prior to supper (with the warm water) and again first thing in the morning (prior to breakfast).

If that doesn't work (no pun intended) just shave a bar of soap. You're a biologist, I'm sure you know what to do next. Here's a hint: Sounds like the popular movie, ENEMY OF THE STATE!
 

Seeing Spots

Joyful Woman!
Re: You people may be laughing.....

Originally posted by Suge
Suge : 30-50, Do you realize that even if I loose 50 lbs I will still be fat, so what is the point. You trying to tell me that I'll be a skinnier fat than I am now, that makes no sense! I can just stay being fat fat!
:D :lmao: :D :lmao: :D :lmao:

SUGE...please STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am laughing at you in love and support. I am not ridiculing you okay!:D :lmao: :D :D :lmao: :lmao: :D

I know exactly how you feel. In 1998, I weighed my heaviest ever, 350 lbs. My pressure was up, cholesterol was off the chart! So I had a doctor like yours who said, change that HAVE TO EAT lifestyle or die young. I had a baby to raise and wanted to live!! So I started out slow but got in the groove! In 8 months I had lost 100 lbs! Exercising and cutting down (not out) the carbs just beat those pounds off!

I know how you feel because I am a carb addict and a sugar-like-crack-cocaine NEEDING freak! So once a week I eat my beloved SNICKER bar and fudge covered oreo cookies and make myself HAPPY for that moment.

You can do it! Just for 30 days she wants to restrict it strong, then you can add more calories and treat yourself a little more each week.

And the answer to your question is YES, it is better to be slimmer fat, than FAT FAT. You are going to FEEL so much better and the endorphins your body will produce will help you adjust that nasty attitude.:D :bawling: :D :bawling: :D :bawling: :D :bawling: :D
 

Suge

The Phat Mack
Kiss my arse Bigg......

MikeBigg, I wish this was a simple as me eating some fast food. I don't eat all that crap. I just like to cook and eat. You talk about yard bird...man I can't even have that (unless of couse its baked, grilled, or boiled). Man the only time I ever wanted to see chicken boiling is when my granny is about to make my parrain some chicken salad! I am not a fast food junkie, just a real food junkie!

You keep it up, and you will be right here with me.

Have any of you ever eaten the actual serving size that is suggested? Dayum...........that ain't ish! Asking me to eat 1 serving is like asking JJ not to say Dynomite!
 

MikeBigg

Well-Known Member
DOTT GAYUM!!!! Did you say 350 lbs? I know why you were seeing spots...I bet you had a constant case of "swimming in the head". I'm glad to see you overcame your er.....gland problem.

I don't mean to be ugly or cruel, but 350 pounds is tooooo much woman for Caesar (and Caesar wanted everything). I'm glad that you were able to get this under control, it was not healthy.
I bet whenever you wore yellow and had to stop, kids mistook you for the yellow school bus!
 

Seeing Spots

Joyful Woman!
Originally posted by MikeBigg
DOTT GAYUM!!!! Did you say 350 lbs? I know why you were seeing spots...I bet you had a constant case of "swimming in the head". I'm glad to see you overcame your er.....gland problem.

I don't mean to be ugly or cruel, but 350 pounds is tooooo much woman for Caesar (and Caesar wanted everything). I'm glad that you were able to get this under control, it was not healthy.
I bet whenever you wore yellow and had to stop, kids mistook you for the yellow school bus!

I did not have a gland problem. And I did not have a problem being wanted by Caesar either. And I never wore yellow.
 

MightyDog

Well-Known Member
Hey Suge this is too good to make a comment.lmao:

But I will advise you: Why don't you do pretend you are a bear for the rest of the Winter?
 

Suge

The Phat Mack
My head is feeling light.......

......I want some food. Man just think, this is only day 2.

Pasta and chicken
Salmon and Spam
Me eating food
Is a part of who I am

I love to savor the flavor
Love to eat eggs and ham
If Dr. Suess was here
I would slap him and sam I am

Fried chiecken, collard greens
Pork chops, and corn on the cob
That is why I went to collage
To be able to buy food with my job
 

J-State Tiger

Senate Candidate #7
Man Huck It! Im on this diet called, cant afford to Eat. So far, My clothes are getting too dayum big, and I need to buy some more. That means less money for food. Its a horrible cycle. If this gets much worse im gonna have to sign a endorsement deal like jared from subway..

Tis Better to have ate and lost, than to have never ate at all.
 

GramTigress

Kelsey's Mom
Re: And then it got worser....

Originally posted by Suge
I really feel like crying. I am so freakin hungry right now I was thinking about eating a booger!

:lmao: ROTFLMBAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :lmao:
 

CSU*NJ

you don't wanna go to war
Re: My head is feeling light.......

Originally posted by Suge
......I want some food. Man just think, this is only day 2.

Pasta and chicken
Salmon and Spam
Me eating food
Is a part of who I am

I love to savor the flavor
Love to eat eggs and ham
If Dr. Suess was here
I would slap him and sam I am

Fried chiecken, collard greens
Pork chops, and corn on the cob
That is why I went to collage
To be able to buy food with my job

Is this the end of the notorious tight shirt?? :idea:
 

TSU/BAMA

Well-Known Member
Suge, I have never met or know you personally, but let me say this. Listen to your doctors!!! We just buried one of my brothers because he would not listen to doctors. Now you can take that for whatever it's worth.
 

ABE

Running and Gunning
Originally posted by J-State Tiger
Man Huck It! Im on this diet called, cant afford to Eat. So far, My clothes are getting too dayum big, and I need to buy some more. That means less money for food. Its a horrible cycle. If this gets much worse im gonna have to sign a endorsement deal like jared from subway..

Tis Better to have ate and lost, than to have never ate at all.

I was on that diet too.. from 98-99 ... I was saved by some home cooked meals and rebounded tremendously.. (don't you think)
 

Vinita

Let's Go Lions, GO!
AWWWW Sugar!!

You can do it! The first month is the hardest, because you and your body have to adjust to a drastic change in your eating habits. Then, you can have the things you love on occasion. You can do this! I am in the process of trying to lose 20 pounds. My doctor has never said I need to lose weight, but I know I am not at my ideal weight, and I have too many of those "inherited illnesses" (diabetes, high cholesterol, heart disease, high blood pressure) to be taking ANY chances. I wanna see Hellfire, Damnation, and Patience graduate from college and a lot more.

I have only been doing it for a couple of weeks, and the hardest thing is staying away from the vending machines ... AND the coke machines. Because I am doing this myself instead of being made to by a doctor, I reward myself by having one meal with fried food and one coke a week. I also started working out again. It ain't easy ... especially when I go by a coke machine, but in the long run, I'll be EVEN FINER and definitely HEALTHIER, so it will be all to the good!

You can do this, phat boy ... I got ya back ... call me and we can whine together and hate on Sperm, who can eat an entire refrigerator and not gain a dayum pound!


SEEING SPOTS, your achievement is quite extraordinary and impressive, as well as inspiring. I'll think of you when I am wavering with my hand trembling at the Coca-Cola button when I am meaning to push the bottled water button right beneath it. :)
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top